Who would have thought that I'd blog less when I'm off of work in the summer?
I guess it's just that I'm not sure if I have anything to say that's any different than the last few things I've said. Bearing that in mind, an update:
~The garden is doing fairly well. We have a rather large crop of tomatoes right now. The little lovely yellow squash that I was not talking about shriveled up and died before its time. I'm now not talking about another friend of the yellow squash on a different plant. We'll see what happens to him.
~I'm excited that I finally picked a wedding present from my grandmother. She had been somewhat badgering me to give her an idea for a gift that 25 years later we'll still have and remember they gave it to us. She's going to have my wedding dress made into a quilt for me. I've wanted to do this for a while, but I wouldn't be able to afford it - even after the wedding. It seems like the perfect gift idea to me. And better yet, she liked the idea, too.
~*B* and I merged our finances a few weeks ago. I thought it would make life a tad more difficult, but shocker, it actually made saving SO much easier. We had had a hard time keeping savings for the wedding. Our last prevailing thought was that we'd put expenses on my credit card and immediately pay it off so that we could get the rewards benefits. But that means that all savings went directly to immediate purchases (my dress) and not long term expenses (the catering). I am pleased to say that we have saved above and beyond the cost of our wedding! Better than that, we have a great system in place for our married (financial) life ahead of us. My insurance agent is also a licensed financial planner, and he helped us set it up for free.
Each of us have our own checking/savings account for personal things - hair cuts, food out, birthday gifts, etc. We then have a joint checking/savings/money market account. Our paychecks are direct deposited into the joint savings account. We then transfer the money needed to pay bills into the checking account. This means that anything we have left at the end of the month doesn't get used on something frivolous, it stockpiles in the savings account. The money market account is currently used for wedding related savings, but in the future it will be for big items, like a roof, a nice vacation, or car troubles. This is where we can put away our emergency savings.
~We finally were able to take our FOCCUS test. This is a test that the Catholic church has couples take in order to determine what things need to be discussed before the wedding. It's 180 questions, and topics include religion, work distribution, sex, abuse, marriage readiness, finances, and others. While I am pleased to say that most of it we had already discussed in great detail, there were a few issues whose absence in our conversations became apparent. Number one of my list is the role of religion in our lives. *B* and I have been going to church for probably a month now. This is the longest stretch that I've gone to church probably since I was 6. I might have gone this long once when I was about 14. And I know for a fact that *B* has never been to church this much in his whole life. He says he likes going to church, and I believe him, but I fear ending up like my family, where my mom took us to church while my dad stayed home. Even as a young child, I knew that my dad thought church was ridiculous, and it was really hard to reconcile the two beliefs in one household. However it ends up, I want *B* and I to provide a united front to our children.
I think that about sums everything up. I go back to work next Monday, so hopefully I'll find much more to say in the coming weeks.
It's better made at home
4 days ago
I think deciding now what kind of role religion will play in your family life before the wedding is essential. Good for you for addressing these things and making goals. My husband and I came from families who had different ideas about church attendance. My family was the kind who went occasionally, and my husbands family were the kind that went weekly and were leaders. We decided we wanted this for our family, and commited to it, 8 years later, and two kids later, I am happy to report we have only missed a handful of times due to serious illness, or birth of a child. We even manage to go on our honeymoon because we wanted to be committed from the start. Today our children have a love for the gospel, love for Jesus Christ,and I know it is partially due to the unwavering commitment both their parents show.
ReplyDeleteI wish you luck in your own new family committment.