The Sting of Rejection

When I was pregnant with Miss F, I talked to my school about taking a leave of absence rather than quitting.  They wouldn't put anything in writing, but they agreed that I could take a leave of absence.  I promised everyone that I'd be back, and I even continued mentoring a former student for free and on my own time.  After I had Miss F, I was a little skeptical about going back, but I kept an open mind.

The first week of March, I got an email from my department chair at my former school.  She said that she had a position available, and that she'd like to bring me on board.  I had planned on not going back, but since the opportunity landed in my inbox, *B* and I talked about it.  He expressed a deep interest in staying home with Miss F, since that wouldn't be possible with our other children.  It'd be a modest increase in income, and we'd have a lot more family time together.  So I agreed.

I was told that I'd have to talk to the principal, so that night I emailed him.  The next day, I sent my resume "just in case."  I heard nothing that first week.  I kept emailing, and eventually he said that he needed to look over the enrollment and that he'd get back to me by Easter.

Easter came and Easter went.  The first day they got back from break (a month after the initial email asking me back), I emailed the principal again.  No answer.  Then I emailed the department chair.  No answer!  Two weeks later, six weeks after I was asked back, I finally called.  The principal wasn't available, but his administrative assistant said that she knew there were no positions available.  I asked her to have the principal call me anyway - I'd feel better hearing it from him.  A couple of hours later she called me back and said that he didn't have time to talk to me, but he said there were no positions.

Ooph.  Gut check.  I worked there four years and I had to hunt them down to try to get my job back?  And even then, I didn't get the courtesy of a phone call from the principal?

*insert downward spiral of low self-esteem and depression here*

BUT

Is this really a bad thing?  No!  It's actually what I wanted!  I get to spend my days doing what I REALLY want to do, taking care of this little lady: