Wednesday, March 24, 2010
I think I've hit the wall. I didn't realize it, but I've been in burnout mode for the last few weeks. I've been going into work JUST on time, and leaving as soon as I'm allowed. I haven't been keeping up with writing down my lesson plans, I haven't been keeping up on my emails, and I get fed up with my only standard level class very quickly. The only day I actually enjoy in my life is Saturday (as I mentioned in my last post).
*B* and I went for a nice little 1 mile walk with Hailey today. On the way home, we stopped at the park and enjoyed the weather for a bit. Or should I say, *B* enjoyed the weather, Hailey enjoyed the squirrels, and I despaired over how I couldn't enjoy myself because I have school tomorrow.
I do try to enjoy what time I have outside of work. And I also try to enjoy work. It's just that I can literally feel my shoulders knotting over themselves as soon as I hit a certain intersection near work. It's like the point of no return. The tension is nearly impossible to release, too. I've realized that I eat to relieve stress - especially pizza and ice cream. While that's nice to know, I can't seem to relieve stress any other way.
At the end of the day, I'm too tired to go to the gym, and I am not the type of person to sit idle. There was a point when I could manage a little better. I'd come home, crash, and watch Wife Swap - the most brainless show there is. Unfortunately, they moved it to daytime only.
I'm hopeful that spring break will really help me get my "mojo" back. After spring break, we only have 7 weeks left. It doesn't feel like that's really true, or even possible. A week of that is exams, and another week and a half is rocket projects for my physics kids. Over the summer, I can work on making my lesson plans more professional looking. Apparently, the first year is the worst, at three you're doing well, then by five years, you are in the groove. I sure hope they're right.