We had a lot of people come to the party last night. Over the course of 6 hours, 22 people came over, which is a lot for any of my parties. Everything started very well, and all was happy. One little event threw me off for the rest of the night, but I recovered fairly well by the end. This morning, however, I'm still heartbroken.
*Shimmery music and picture as flashback starts*
My dad has not spoken to his parents in about a year and a half. He says that they did things to him when he was younger (punishing him twice for things he had done, giving him no choice in how he lived his life while he was a child) and that they are nasty people (they can be very critical and hypocritical). They pushed him too far on Mother's Day in 2008 when he tried to bridge the gap, and they started complaining about him.
*End flashback*
I invited my grandparents because we still talk and get along, and because they had never seen my apartment when I lived there, so I figured they should see my house. I invited my dad because I wanted him there. When he saw my grandparents, he ran downstairs for a good 10-15 minutes. I went down to keep him company after a while, and he chided me for inviting both of them, and said he should have been told so that he wouldn't have come to the party. After they went outside, he left for the night. Subsequently, I went downstairs and cried for a good 5 minutes with *B* and my mom.
Here's my problem/question: Is it my job to arrange custody? What is he going to do at my wedding? The birth of my children? Christenings? Childrens' birthdays? My grandparents have a right to see their family, and I have very limited time to spend with just them.
How do I rectify this with my dad? Since he and my mom split, we've had a much better relationship. I was so hurt when he left yesterday. If I try to tell him this in person, he will dominate the conversation.
Beyond that, I reconnected with some friends I had in high school. It's good to have local friends again. We're planning on hanging out much more from now on. They even asked *B* to preside at their wedding. They got me up to speed about what's been going on in my ex's life. It's nice to know how he's doing.
We had a TON of food, though I was SO worried about how much food there'd be. We had everything from chili to crab dip and crab cakes to taco dips and more. A good time seemed to be had by the vast majority of those who came here.
At the end of the night, we lit a fire in this tiny, tiny fire pit we have. It was great to just sit around and talk. I loved it.
Today, I'm actually excited to write tons of thank you notes. That will be the second thing I do - right after I clean!
Prepare Your Family with the “What if …?’ Game
7 hours ago
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